


the kind of human wreckage that you love

by orphan_account



Category: IT - Stephen King
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Getting Together, M/M, Mental Health Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-02
Updated: 2019-12-02
Packaged: 2021-02-17 21:28:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21650107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Stanley Uris, 15, just had his first kiss and kind of wants to die. And not the “I'm in love” kind of death, but the “sweet release from the agony that is life” kind.
Relationships: Bill Denbrough/Stanley Uris, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 2
Kudos: 57





	the kind of human wreckage that you love

**Author's Note:**

> hey i think this is a first in a series so stay tuned!

Stanley Uris, 15, just had his first kiss and kind of wants to die. And not the “I'm in love” kind of death, but the “sweet release from the agony that is life” kind, because you know, Lauren Simmons was definitely not who he wanted to be his first kiss. Is it weird that he feels kind of violated right now? Lauren did not warn him at all, just went for it. That was not good, Stan is a man of planning and organizing. On top of it all, he doesn't even like her, he's damn sure he's gay, but with exceptions, like Megan Fox but everybody thinks she's hot, right? Anyways, Stan is gay and did he mention, very in love with his best friend. 

Ah, yes Bill Denbrough, Big Bill, Billy Boy, has stolen his heart and probably half of the schools girls´. His OCD diagnosis from last year is not helping, he's just noticing all the small but important things Bill does. They've been friends since kindergarten and about a year ago he started realizing his feelings. Everyone who's been in love with their best friend knows it's simultaneously the best and definitely the worst feeling in the world. So, let's have a look at what got him into this mess. 

Growing up in a strict jewish family and his dad always finding him nice little jewish girls to play with him so he'd fall in love and have a perfect jewish life was hard. Even harder at 13, when he realized he's gay and got his first crush on a boy (it was Richie Tozier, though nobody has to know that). He came out to his mom at 15, knowing she'd accept him. He didn't dare tell his dad though, he even made her mom promise not to tell him, as he was very traditional and slightly homophobic. That was also the year he and his friends started in a new school, which just brought him more stress added to the stress of having to keep his sexuality a secret and all that casually being in love with his best friend shit, so he was under a huge load of stress and anxiety. 

Bill started noticing his stressing, just the little “I can't I've got homework” in a distressed voice and the pale skin and the rings under his eyes caught his attention. When he confronted him about it, Stan just brushed it off as puberty and growing up. Bill did not buy that shit. He needed to find a way to get inside his head. So, he talked to Richie, the brains of their friend group. Richie, at first said he should just yell at him until he said something but Bill wasn't just going to hurt his best friends feelings so Richie recommended to host a sleepover because people are just more open in the middle of the night and tired. He should really trust Richie on this, it's how Richie got Eddie to be his boyfriend. 

The night of the sleepover, Stan was nervous. When Bill had asked him to come over, he had sounded like something was wrong. Surely everything was fine right? It was probably just his anxiety taking over his thoughts again. So, he folded everything neatly into his backpack and biked over to Bill's house. 

After the boys settled on a movie to watch they got comfortable and chitchatted trough the movie. It was a boring one so missing it didn't really matter, what mattered though was Bill getting to talk to Stan. They got to bed, Stan blushing furiously when Bill asked if he wanted to sleep with him in his bed. They giggled for hours when unexpectedly, surprising himself, Stan opened his mouth and blurted out that he's gay. Bill was shocked, but told him it's totally okay, that he's been questioning his sexuality too, and that he's come to the conclusion that he's bisexual. This obviously made Stan suddenly lose his breath and his heart started racing so damn fast he couldn't even get an answer out of his mouth, so he just smiled the biggest smile he could. 

They continued giggling like nothing had happened, but Stan finally felt a little ease in his stress. He felt as if he had now bonded with Bill more than anyone else in their small friend group. What he didn't think was that Bill had feelings for him too. The same day he went to Richie for advice, he also confessed about his crush. Richie's response to that was just that it was a thing he needed to figure out himself. 

Bill had fallen for Stan because of his smile and bright eyes when he talked about things he was passionate about, his blush when Bill touched him, it was the blush Stan thought nobody saw but Bill did. Bill likes him for his quirks, his obsession with books and animals, his curls that turned golden in the sun, there wasn't a thing he didn't love about Stan. Bill had fallen for him and his mental illnesses had no effect on it. He comforted Stan when he had a breakdown and was next to him at the time of his biggest accomplishments. 

The one thing on both boys' minds was just wanting to confess but not wanting to be rejected. Stan spent the next week kind of depressed and just wanting things to work out of this knot of fuckery he had gotten himself into. Bill noticed this, of course and knew better than to treat him like shit for not wanting to do anything. Instead he was just more affectionate with Stan so he knew he wasn't alone in whatever he was going trough. 

How he ever dared to confess, he'll never know. It was a blur of a drunken night with their friends and apparently Bill had stood up on a table and yelled something about Stanley Uris being the love of his life. Stan himself was bright red on the dancefloor and felt like he was going to pass out. Beverly dragged him off the table and told Stan to go work things out in the bathroom. 

Stan didn't remember a lot of what happened in the bathroom, being quite buzzed himself but somehow they ended at Bill's and in the same bed, with their clothes on fortunately. Stan was not planning on losing his virginity drunk at 17. The morning after on the other hand was in Stan's head clear as a day. Bill had woken up first with a pounding headache obviously and could not comprehend that Stan was indeed in his bed. Hazy memories from last night flooded to his head along with a definite blush on his whole body. He tried to stand up to get some aspirin for himself and ibuprofen for Stan as he knew that's what he prefers, but his legs just didn't cooperate. The sudden movement caused Stan to wake up, groan in pain and then jolt up when he remembered where he was. 

Bill knew they would have to have the awkward morning after talk now, there was no avoiding it. Luckily they both felt the same and the conversation ended in a shy peck on the lips that made both of the boys blush furiously. Stan was over the moon. Bill seriously liked him back? He just couldn't believe that Bill was finally his boyfriend and most importantly, Bill was just as in love as him. They hadn't said it yet obviously but they both knew well enough. 

They made an agreement to sleep some more as it was only 8am on a Sunday, so Stan awkwardly shuffled closer to Bill, who wrapped an arm around him smiling uncontrollably. Stan was finally content with his life, knowing Bill cared about him and he wouldn't ever have to go trough depressive episodes alone. Now he had a reason to live.

**Author's Note:**

> leave a comment if you enjoyed!  
> also go check out my tumblr @ s-stanleyuris


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